Managing Workplace Conflict Effectively Without Damaging Relationships

I’ve seen my fair share of workplace conflicts, from an argument in the executive suite to disagreements among team members to fights on the factory floor, including one that nearly became a knife fight.

But conflict doesn’t have to be a four-letter word, and it doesn’t have to end up with blood spraying the walls.

How do you manage conflict without actually damaging the relationships or pulling out the “because I’m the boss, that’s why!” card?

First, it’s important to recognize that conflict is inevitable. It’s also important. You may not agree with me, but that’s conflict right there. I can say something, you can disagree with me, and we are in conflict.

If you’re a leader and everyone agrees with everything you say ever, you’re running a very dysfunctional team. Because they’re either lying to you or they’re agreeing with every idea you have, including the bad ones.

But if you know how to harness conflict, you can turn that energy into something more productive. The key is to view conflicts as opportunities for growth, not obstacles or a sign that you’re doing a bad job.

It Starts With Communication

Clear, open, and honest communication can prevent major conflict, usually because most conflict is based on emotions. And if it’s not, it’s because people aren’t checking their egos at the door and bringing their brains inside, which is one of my non-negotiables.

So, when conflicts arise, avoid the urge to sweep them under the rug or to hash it out over email. Instead, face the issue head-on with a normal face-to-face conversation, like adults.

Just remember, effective communication isn’t just about talking, it’s also about practicing active listening. That means you give your full attention, ask clarifying questions, and repeat what you’ve heard to make sure you understand the other person.

Remember, your goal isn’t to win the argument, it’s to find a solution that works for everyone and helps the company. So leave your ego at the door, bring your brains inside, and focus on the issue at hand. I realize people like to say, “it’s not personal, it’s just business.” Except it is personal because we’re dealing with human beings with feelings and perspectives.

So, while you may be able to get people to leave their egos at the door, there’s a very good chance it snuck in anyway. You don’t want to hurt people’s feelings, which is why talking and listening is so important. The goal is to treat the conversation like you’re troubleshooting a machine — with patience, curiosity, and a desire to understand how all the parts work together.

The Art of Compromise
In manufacturing, we’re always looking for that perfect balance between cost and quality. That applies to conflict resolution as well. You need to find a solution that satisfies everyone’s core needs without anything feeling like they’ve been thrown under the boss.

Your goal with a compromise is to create a win-win situation, not to crush your opponent. Or as Conan the Barbarian said it, “To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentations of their women.”

This is NOT the goal of a negotiation, no matter what you’ve been told.

Clearly state your position and listen to the other person’s perspective. Then, you both need to come up with solutions that address both sides’ concerns. It’s like designing a new product: You have to consider all the specifications, constraints, and costs before you come up with the final design.

To do this, focus on the person’s interests, not their positions. Positions are what people say they want, while their interests are the underlying motivations for wanting it. By understanding their interests, you can often find a creative solution that will satisfy everyone.

Emotional Intelligence Is Your Secret Weapon
When it comes to managing conflict, your EQ (emotional quotient) is just as important as your IQ.

Emotional intelligence is about recognizing and managing your own emotions — leaving your ego at the front door — as well as understanding and influencing the emotions of others. (Because there’s a good chance they didn’t.)

Start by practicing self-awareness. Pay attention to your own emotions during conflicts. Are you getting defensive and angry? Recognizing these emotions can help you manage them more effectively.

Next, work on your empathy skills by trying to see the situation from the other person’s perspective. What’s driving their behavior? What concerns or fears do they have? This could be something greater than just being right or having their idea chosen — is their job at risk if your idea goes through? How will that affect their family’s future? People often imagine the worst when it comes to their jobs, and that includes worried they’re going to lose their jobs and their homes, so keep that in mind when you’re dealing with someone who’s angry about your ideas.

Finally, use your emotional intelligence to manage the emotional tone of the conversation. If things start to heat up, take a step back and help everyone to cool off. Say something like, “I see this is a sensitive issue for both of us. Let’s take a break and a couple deep breaths. We’ll come back to it when we’re feeling calmer.”

Managing conflict is all about communication, compromise, and emotional intelligence. It’s not always easy, especially when you’re sure that your way is the right way — a common problem for many leaders, manufacturing or otherwise. Just take a deep breath, follow these strategies, and you can transform potential disasters into productive discussions.

I’ve been a manufacturing executive, as well as a sales and marketing professional, for a few decades. Now, I help companies turn around their own business, including pivoting within their industry. If you would like more information, please visit my website and connect with me on Twitter, Facebook, or LinkedIn.

Photo credit: Antoni Shkraba (Pexels, Creative Commons 0)